We think that this is a bit of controversial and worrying issue. We think that younger and older people may see the issue somewhat differently. We know that our role is not to instruct anyone. But we do think that a few thoughts on this matter may be helpful, for adults, parents, teenagers, and children…

The desire and or need to conform. In particular the desire or need to conform when it overrules or overpowers independent critical thinking and personal decision making. Usually considered in the context of children and young adults where it is most common and obvious perhaps, peer pressure actually affects all of us. So, is it a bad thing? What harm can it do? How can we, and our children, understand this powerful force and make sure we are not swallowed up as individuals altogether…

Standing-out – in the sense of “in a crowd” – can be uncomfortable (and in ancient times, a survival risk) and so the desire to conform and comply is in all of us. It is when this desire becomes a need, a primary need considered before and above all else (like personal preference and choice), that we see “peer pressure” as a problem. When conforming becomes our main aim. When we subvert our actual views, opinions and preferences in favour of “following the trend”. Then we risk losing ourselves as individuals.

Peer pressure sometimes operates formally and openly, such is in the membership of political parties, or churches, where acceptance of a certain view or dogma is a membership requirement. More commonly, peer pressure is less structured, obvious, and stated. Subtle, and not-so-subtle hints are commonly seen in things like dress-habits, music choices, political leanings, and so forth.

Most people believe that social media accelerates or multiplies the effect of peer pressure, in essence because influential people (more and more actually known as “influencers”) can easily reach huge audiences instantly. But peer pressure has deep roots in human psyche (some might say “human-psych-frailty”) so we cannot really see social media as having created peer pressure (accelerating and creating being different).

Peer pressure: an understandable and in-part inescapable force that encourages conformity among people. Also a worrying trend towards excessive same-ness that may see individual opinion and freedom diluted or lost. Certainly something to think about. Certainly something to discuss at home, especially if you have a young family.