That awful feeling of emptiness. Nothing to do. Or nothing interesting (or enjoyable or stimulating or worthwhile) to do. Or feeling disinterested and fed-up with what we are doing. Boring!
Boredom is a feeling we all know. And have known since childhood. In some ways it is simply one part of human experience and something to accept. In some ways. And in part. Yes. But there are a few additional thoughts that might be helpful or of interest here…
Judgement. We often respond to a person who says they are bored, with some level of judgement. The notion is based on the idea that we “should not” be bored. It is somehow lazy or inadequate of us to be bored. We see this especially in parents who will often chastise a child (it is not always obvious but a sigh or a click or a shrug can speak volumes) for being bored. This impatience is understandable of course (and indeed, some kids can be spoiled and overly “needy” maybe) but perhaps unhelpful. It is better to engage: What do you mean? How do you feel? What are you doing now? What would you like to do? Is there anything else you want to tell me maybe? This sort of approach will lead to the constructive chat about what to do. But it will also help identify anything else -sometimes boredom is used to hide other hard-to-express feelings like sadness or fear or anxiety etc. Judging boredom is almost always a poor idea.
Boredom may be a sign of depression. Depression often involves a loss of interest generally. People withdraw from things they previously enjoyed. This might be sport, socialising, reading, a hobby, or anything really. Even eating and even sex can be affected in this way. One part of this may be a feeling of boredom as nothing seems of interest or value. This is probably overlooked too often so if you feel bored, or know someone who seems bored, please think about the possibility of depression. Caution: boredom can just be that: boredom. Please do not go around making psychiatric diagnoses on anyone who sits still a bit too long once or twice. Perspective in all things. But yes, boredom can mask depression.
Boredom can be an opportunity. Notwithstanding the points above, an experience of boredom and or disinterest can be used as a trigger for review, introspection, self-analysis, and “looking in the mirror”. This often helps us to reprioritise some things. We might set new goals, We may ditch certain out of date ideas, thoughts, activities, or people, even. If we use boredom as a nudge to take a new look at some things, that is almost always going to end well.
Boredom: a universal experience certainly. Also something we might manage a bit better and even leverage as an opportunity in life management.
Written by Dr Colin Burns
